Why?
by death-sama-lover
Summary: Izayas numb and he wants to feel again; but what if he feels again in the arms of the man who pushed him into this state? Rated M, violence self abuse cutting and cussing and possible Mpreg. You've been warned boy boy SHIZAYA


It was again one of those beautiful days when the sun shined bright, the birds chirped and sang on their fullest and roads got ever so busy; busy enough to give a man a headache. The tall buildings did cover up most of the city so that the people wouldn't get sun burnt but then again; no building's too tall and wide to block off the mighty sun.

There on the top floor of the tallest building of Shinjuku smiled a certain raven with shoulder length black hair, crimson eyes filled with mischief, a slender body to top it all off and a perfectly pale complexion; every curve and end of this existence screamed out beauty on its own, it screamed perfection and to be lusted upon; and who wouldn't lust for the 24 year old informant who worked for the mafia of Japan; the Awakusu group who were ready to become one of the largest mafia group of the entire world; slowly and smoothly extending from the depths of Japan to USA, France, Canada, China and slowly making its way to Russia and Africa; their plans were smooth, a bit too smooth for their own good, and there was only one name that was the reason for their sudden growth in the past 4 years; Orihara Izaya; Shikis' best informant ever.

Izaya loved his job; although his job was taxing and took a huge toll on his health and diet but it was a little sacrifice he was willing to give in order for having all the luxuries that Shiki showered him with.

The raven rolled his seat to a full 360 degrees and smiled as he looked out at the people below; they looked so small from the 49th floor of this building, almost like a busy network of ants. Izaya liked his subjects small and helpless; one disturbance and either all of them disperse or find a new path to move on; it really fascinated him that how he could make and break these beings according to his whims; he could easily predict what everyone was thinking about; he could tell what moves they were going to make and he could infer every single data about them right to their genetic level; making him feel so godly and superior. He chuckled at the thought as he ran his thin fingers softly through his hair, moving some strands away from his sight only to have them fall back again. The raven couldn't take his eyes off the calendar; he had done his errands for today and now he was completely free to do as he pleased. Right now, the only thing that was on his mind was that today was his first anniversary; it had been a whole year since he'd been together with the love of his life.

He laughed softly as he tried to think of everything that he was going to do to please his lover. Elegantly, he got up from his chair as he fixed up his shirt; pulling it down he headed off for his apartment; apparently which was connected to his workplace. He entered his massive apartment area as he looked around to see that the decorations were just the way he had planned, white tube roses had decorated and painted the room with their mesmerizing scent; a trail of rose petals led to his bedroom towards his bed which was decorated by a deep maroon silk bed sheet and was decorated by white and red petals making a heart; pink petals scattered slightly to give a slight balance; then he entered his washroom to see his large pool sized tub to be fill with Sakura petals and a little of bubbles on the side; his love had a thing for soap bubbles. Satisfied, the raven entered the kitchen and turned on the stove and the oven to make the most perfect meal he could think of; he took the rice off the stove and slowly added them in a dish, garnishing them with lemon and mint leaves; then added chicken chilli dry into a bowl and decorated a plate of chicken leg pieces that were thoroughly baked in the oven with coal to give off a bar b que taste with mint and green chilli chutney. For desserts he placed the little vanilla and mango cream sponge cake out of the refrigerator and onto the table lighting a candle beside it in a candle stand; he placed Russian salad as starters on the table and then placed the dishes and glasses that they were going to dine in with.

When he was satisfied with the level of perfection he smiled. Looking at the clock he saw that it was 8:45 p.m. already and his mate was going to be here any minute; he rushed to his guest room to get changed into something more civilized that gave the feel of the event; he wouldn't want his day to be ruined or his partner to think that he wasn't taking their anniversary seriously; although he hadn't told his partner that he was arranging this extravaganza for him; he just told him that he should hang over at his place; much to his surprise his partner agreed without a fuss.

Izaya put on a midnight blue shirt with a deep neck and capris followed by ankle boots and his rings plus the plastic ring his lover had given to him when he confessed his love to hi.; Izaya hadn't taken it off ever since. He wore silver bracelets and a little mascara to top it all off. He looked at the clock, it was already 9:20 p.m. 'he would be here any minute now...' Thought izaya as he seated himself on the chair and poured coke for them; he looked at his door cheerfully as he waited patiently for his lover to arrive.

~~~TIME SKIP~~~

It was 11:00 p.m. and izaya was still looking at the friggin door; irritated he got up and marched outside his door and onto the streets, he mumbled to himself "Shizu Chan you are so dead for forgetting this, wait till I come to your place to knock some sense into you... Why the hell do you have to be so damn unpredictable... God I can never get you." He grunted as he walked through the empty streets and headed towards shizuos place.

It took him about half an hour to get there in front of his lovers place. He was so damn angry that he could kill a whole city. Of course he wanted his first anniversary perfect; after all he is a perfectionist and he likes everything perfect, even his boyfriend to act as perfect, he tried so hard to make this perfect and commemorating and shizuo was no way in hell going to fuck this up for Izaya.

Izaya opened the wooden door of his lovers apartment and entered inside; he entered to see the lights dim; the place was barely visible so slowly he made his way; chuckling and scheming to pounce on his blond brute. Izaya approached shizuos room and slowly opened the door.

He peeked inside but what he saw was indescribable; there on shizuos bed lay a blonde woman with her hands locked in shizuos hair as she screamed and moaned in pleasure as shizuo pounded into her vagina; he was grunting and growling as the woman pulled his hair tightly.

Izaya looked at the couple and slowly backed away; tears threatening to fall as he rushed out of the apartment with the speed his legs could manage while his mind was a total mess; he rushed as fast as he could and finally when he entered his place he fell to his knees as he started sobbing in despair screaming in agony as he weakly pushed himself up from the floor and into the living room; he pulled the flowers from the walls and broke the vases; he threw the contents on the floor that rested on the table and smashed the bottle of beer that he had ordered; he entered his room and pulled the bed sheet from the bed and tossed it aside in fury; he took his empty hand and formed them into fists as he started punching his mirror, the mirror taking all it could broke down and shattered as different pieces showed Izayas blood on them; he took out his pocket knife and a lighter from his pocket and threw the open lighter on the sheet as it caught fire; Izayas room was turning orange but Izaya didn't care; he put the blade on his wrist as he started slashing his wrists; more blood oozed out of his skin as Izayas vision got blurry; his world got blank and soon he heard a long siren; so loud that he couldn't infer anything; slowly the ravens world turned black as he mumbled unconsciously" shizu Chan why? I love you!"

**SO THIS IS MY SECOND DURARARA FANFICTION**

**DO TELL ME HOW IT IS**

**ITS A BIT DARKER THAN USUAL BUT YOU CAN ALWAYS REVIEW**

**REVIEWS ARE WELCOMED**

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**THANK YOU READERS**

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**HEHEHE AT LEAST TELL ME THAT SHOULD I CONTINUE WITH THIS STORY OR NOT? BECAUSE APPARENTLY A PLOT BUNNY ATTACKED ME AND URGED TO WRITE IT. LOL**

**REVIEW AND LOTS OF LOVE TO MY READERS 3**

**do Check out my other fics too and tell me how they are :)**

**Suggestions are welcome :)**

**PM me if you need Ta know anything or need to suggest anything :) OR want to request a pairing. :)**

**Good night because it is almost 2:00 a.m lol :D**

**Take care lovelies 3**


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